3 tactics to battle bad days.

Why? I ask. The rain massages my face while the darkness illuminates the moon light, I cry. My heart’s beating in slow motion as I stand in isolation. I just don’t understand why I’m living amongst the desolation. These drugs still living in my veins pumping through my arteries, am I so vain to ask for help? The pain this addiction has caused me. I’m trying so hard. Like a worm swimming to the surface of the storm. I was warned.

It’s like the ship wrecked and I’m swimming against the current to a life boat which is drifting further and further away. With each splash of my flailing arms the ripples created are pushing my chance of survival away. The more I try the bigger the ripples, and the further my chance goes.

As I tread water contemplating my existence, my fear turned into acceptance. With one last deep breath I sink. The pressure builds in my chest and begins to convulse. My mind remains calm. I’m squeezing my eyes together so tight my eyelids overlap until in a seamless bridge through space, I suck in my first breath and open my eyes in a new place. The waters of the earth became the air of Heaven.

I don’t know what a supernatural Heaven is, only a superficial Earth. Even if I was in Heaven would I know I was there? The days during destructive addiction are blinding. Often I'd say I was in a living hell. Today I've often said the opposite. It's as if I'm being introduced to Heaven. This quote sums it all up to me "Our momentary sufferings are working in us to produce eternal glory." I have three perspectives that help me understand it. 

Hindsight is 20/20

While living through the suffering of my life, it wasn’t until I accepted that I had to let go and let that me die, before I could move on to my new life. In the moment I wanted answers. It wasn’t until the moment had passed that I could see the solution. Had I never lived that life, I would have never had made it here. This is often the case. When we look back on our life experience, only then can it make sense. Steve Jobs said, “You can only connect the dots of the past.” I prefer hindsight is 20/20.

Looking toward development

Believing hindsight is 20/20 is mostly true, I look toward development in the moment. Instead of asking "why", I ask "what is this stress developing?" Often in the case of our sufferings, they are not meaningless. They are priceless. If we search for what they are teaching us and how they are connecting us or shaping us, we can have a glimpse into our future hindsight.

Moments pass

Whether or not you believe in something eternal you know for a fact we live in moments. Each moment is connected to each in succession blended through our connection to life time. Our problems in adolescence are separate from those as teenagers. We live through and carry their experience with us into adulthood. In the span of our life, these moments are mostly just a blip on our timeline. It is much easier to suffer knowing full well, that has all moments do, this too shall pass.

By these realizations, hindsight being 20/20, looking toward development and recognizing moments pass help me through the sufferings of life. Specifically focusing on the developments in hindsight allow me to know in the end I will be a completely different person from who I am today. A person who has been developed and refined continuously through the sufferings of life. As I believe there is more after this, something eternal, this training then produces a nobility that cannot die.


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